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Okay, this post is not really filled with any such tips. But seeing  as how I was going to make a renewed commitment to posting, and I had not posted anything in a while, I’m tapping away and hopefully putting together a coherent string of words that you may find useful in your life, or make you laugh, or think, “I could do better than this moron”, and start your own writing endeavor, whether it’s the secret history of your hometown that’s never been told, a journal detailing your ideas for not-yet-named-by-popular-culture sexual positions, or your own blog read by dozens of people a month, then, well, starting with this run-on-sentence was totally worth it.

In other words, this is the equivalent of that thing Sean Connery told the basketball star and budding writer extraordinaire in “Finding Forrester”. In that movie, he encouraged the kid to prime the pump creatively by simply tapping away at the typewriter without thinking. Even if it meant plagiarizing the first few lines of a magazine article, which helped lead to the movie’s rousing finale where said basketball star, accused of plagiarizing, is rescued by the reclusive James Bond, er, William Forrester, during a prep school tribunal of some sort.

And for sitting through this so far, you’ve earned it. Just go ahead and skip to about the 1:25 mark:

Anyway, it’s not really the wintertime that brings about this ennui that in effect, freezes my blog, it’s work. For those who don’t know, this is my busy time of the year, and although I am working fewer hours this year, actually working at work, full speed the whole time I’m there sometimes leaves me bereft of ideas for when I get home.  But this year, I said I would fight through it, instead of making excuses. Except I’ve been making excuses.

But enough about process. What can I tell you of interest these days? Well, uh, um…nothing really. I’ve been selected to participate in a mock trial at work. I’m sure it would be mad interesting if I was actually a lawyer. What made it worse was that a fellow participant told me what he thinks the case will be, and it’s supposed to be boring as all-get out. No massively great courtroom moments like…

No, I can’t handle the truth: I’ll be bored to death, but breakfast and lunch are free, so I’ll do it.  Heck, I’d settle for that episode of Benson where Benson, acting as his own lawyer, cross-examined himself on the witness stand. Or when the trial ends, and his comic foil, Clayton, is awarded one dollar in damages, Clayton says “It’s like a slap in the face.” Benson then says, “Then here’s ten dollars. Slap yourself silly.”

The only other notable thing for the new year is that I cut my hair, which was turning into something that was not quite dreadlocks, but not quite an Afro. It was like a dreadmullet. It’s a good thing I picked what appears to be the worst winter in years to finally cut my hair. But hey, it’s probably what got me selected for the mock trial.

To paraphrase DMX, I’ve gone on long enough, time to stop being greedy. Thanks for tuning in.


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