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When it’s not just one thing over the weekend, it’s a series of little inane idiocies put together:

  • This week’s well whiskey: Lauder Reserve.
  • You need two essential things for a dinner at Yakiniku West, an excellent Japanese barbecue place in the, ironically, East Village: a reservation and clean socks.
  • Ace Bar lives up to its name when it isn’t overly crowded.
  • No, we don’t know that people know you here.
  • Least menacing potential fight since “Bridget Jones Diary”: A guy in khaki pants taking on a guy in hiked-up corduroy pants. Thank goodness security was all over that one.
  • Is the Lower East Side becoming the new Meatpacking District? It may be easier to find affordable housing there than an less-than-packed bar on a weekend night.
  • tipping your movers in whiskey slush is surprisingly effective
  • Even a fresh-off-the-boat cabdriver will not buy that your cup o’ whiskey slush for the road is really a Dunkin’ Donuts Citrus Coollata, but if he’s cool, he’ll humor you
  • Wilson Whiskey has the perfect well whiskey motto: “That’s all”
  • A bag of bags, specifically a large purse filled with increasingly smaller ones: an existential crisis wrapped around a conceptual dilemma
  • Trapped on the floor of a self-storage space is no way to spend your Saturday night, so start screaming
  • Every once in a while, after a long day, you need a solid hour of Hall and Oates at the bar
  • Creating a dance called “the JFK” where you mimic him getting shot are apparently not cool with everyone
  • You just cannot recommend to a woman by herself to take the J train to Jamaica Center at 1 am.
  • If you want to post-game at someones apartment on a Saturday night, make that decision before the blue laws kick in and you can still buy beer.
  • Drawing the curtains for unobstructed apartment windows would probably be a good idea, for those inside and outside of my bedroom.
  • A hilarious comedy-music routine can beat a stunning burlesque show
  • A DJ sing-along contest cannot beat the star of said burlesque show and her posse when they decide to take over the stage and simulate something out of Caligula
  • We are the world, we are the children
  • Someday you may find yourself leading a karaoke sing-along of ‘We are the World’ where everyone in the bar is on stage, but you have the microphone, and you may ask yourself: “How the hell did I get here?”. Then, you begin wondering: Who the hell invited Dan Aykroyd?!

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